i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
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