I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
