Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
