I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
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