turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
The uberlube is also flammable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I think my moral compass just broke
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