honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
You took a bar mat shot.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
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