i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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