So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
