fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Randomize