Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
