that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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