So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
