So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
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