Texts From Last Night

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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I puked a lego.

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  (603): I puked a lego. http://tfl.nu/7r9h
  Replies (10) Good night (1778) Bad night (2702)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food

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  (720): Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food http://tfl.nu/f7o2
  Replies (121) Good night (7597) Bad night (1668)
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.

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  (240): I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way. http://tfl.nu/5yxg
  Replies (26) Good night (4168) Bad night (1569)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses

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  (423): he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses http://tfl.nu/s1hg
  Replies (44) Good night (1361) Bad night (5690)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.

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  (313): So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial. http://tfl.nu/zbd1
  Replies (8) Good night (1161) Bad night (4716)
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  (340): View more from US Virgin Islands

  $1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.

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  (340): $1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end. http://tfl.nu/eqa9
  Replies (4) Good night (3631) Bad night (727)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural

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  (630): Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural http://tfl.nu/4h5e
  Replies (6) Good night (883) Bad night (2468)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.

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  (815): There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed. http://tfl.nu/rw7p
  Replies (4) Good night (3154) Bad night (815)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.

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  (210): If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever. http://tfl.nu/5js7
  Replies (8) Good night (4204) Bad night (889)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame

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  (724): i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame http://tfl.nu/h4cx
  Replies (1) Good night (2197) Bad night (635)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.

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  (360): It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha. http://tfl.nu/9aca
  Replies (3) Good night (1365) Bad night (793)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.

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  (410): It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions. http://tfl.nu/65l6
  Replies (1) Good night (1183) Bad night (427)
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.

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  (507): He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool. http://tfl.nu/651b
  Replies (6) Good night (1188) Bad night (526)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.

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  (802): at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record. http://tfl.nu/do7t
  Replies (6) Good night (869) Bad night (430)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?

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  (214): I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date? http://tfl.nu/4sr6
  Replies (4) Good night (312) Bad night (543)

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