I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
