Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
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