We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Randomize