and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
BRING THE BAGELS
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
