ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
