do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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