Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Randomize