Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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