i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
