The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Randomize
