If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
