Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
