Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize