I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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