so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
You were trust falling into bushes
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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