that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
