they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
