we have officially mastered the walk of shame
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
