Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Randomize