No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize