god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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