you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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