Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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