Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize