hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
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