i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
