She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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