finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
