Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
