Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Use "feeling words"
Yay
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
