is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
