I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
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