I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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