imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
