What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I would ride that face into the sunset
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
