Porn is love you can see.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize