we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
