Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Holy sore nipples Batman
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
