The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
